The following is purely satirical and entirely fictional.
Though many students easily recognize the familiar faces of Nassau Hall and know about the people who run Princeton, they often overlook the critical members of the team that run the school from behind the scenes.
Here are some of those figures:
“Speciesism runs rampant at Princeton,” EEB concentrator Riley Shannon ’24 explained in an interview with the Daily PrintsAnything. “There are underground figures shaping fundamental aspects of our college experience every day, but since they don’t have fancy offices or listserv access, they don’t receive the same acknowledgement for the work they do.”
First-year students new to the communal showering scene confirm that the omnipresence of Princeton’s “Underground Administration” rivals that of other influential organizations on campus. “They’re everywhere,” Denzel Mullins ’27 notes, “and that makes you move through your time at Princeton a little differently.” Not unlike the Honor Committee, Mullins says that these smaller members of campus “certainly make me watch where I step.”
Mya Koffie is a first-year contributing humor writer from Appleton, WI. She remains an avid lover of her res college, Rockefeller, in spite of the little friends she's met in the showers. She can be reached at mya.koffie@princeton.edu.
Read More
Over half of the Politics department switched majors following the election
Spencer BaumanAn email was sent to all undergraduate students at 12:24 p.m. on Wednesday, Nov. 6, saying that TigerHub was down for repairs following the “unprecedented number of students attempting to switch departments.”
An email was sent to all undergraduate students at 12:24 p.m. on Wednesday, Nov. 6, saying that TigerHub was down for repairs following the “unprecedented number of students attempting to switch departments.”
End your craving for raving: The top five alternatives to a night out on Prospect Ave
Tarun IyengarFor many students, they believe the only way they can enjoy their time at the University is by spending every night partying on Prospect Avenue. However, there are many other options students overlook when trying to have some fun. We at The Daily PrintsAnything want you to consider these five unique ways to make your nights out extraordinary!
For many students, they believe the only way they can enjoy their time at the University is by spending every night partying on Prospect Avenue. However, there are many other options students overlook when trying to have some fun. We at The Daily PrintsAnything want you to consider these five unique ways to make your nights out extraordinary!
We heard there’s a huge erection this week
Daily PrintsAnything StaffRecent campus discourse has surrounded this Tuesday’s huge erection. We at the Daily PrintsAnything know this erection is so big it’s hard to cover, but here’s a little taste of the discussion around campus as the erection reaches its climax.
Recent campus discourse has surrounded this Tuesday’s huge erection. We at the Daily PrintsAnything know this erection is so big it’s hard to cover, but here’s a little taste of the discussion around campus as the erection reaches its climax.
