The following content is purely satirical and entirely fictional.
Princeton Builds Wells on Goheen Walk
Vitus Larrieu / The Daily PrintsAnything
Princeton Builds Wells in Yeh College
Vitus Larrieu / The Daily PrintsAnything
Princeton Builds Wells inside dormitories
Vitus Larrieu / The Daily PrintsAnything
Princeton Builds Wells on Alexander Beach
Vitus Larrieu / The Daily PrintsAnything
Princeton Builds Wells... yeah... this is a well
Vitus Larrieu / The Daily PrintsAnything
Vitus Larrieu is a reporter on well affairs, and can be reached at vl7131@princeton.edu.
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Princeton won’t divest from Israel if you won’t
Roberto Sampaio“I find it hard to make decisions too,” Arthur Patterson ’27 said. “What if I say I want to study at Firestone, but all my friends secretly wanted to study in Frist and didn’t tell me as a test. Now they all hate me. This has happened before. With three different friend groups.”
Princeton should play its Trump card and DOGE the funding attacks
Tarun IyengarWe have the chance to create a valuable partnership with the powers that be and avoid the fate of some of our more naïve friends across the Ivy League. Nevertheless, it will require us to do more than just remove the DEI from our motto “Dei sub numine viget”. Using the following steps below, we can ensure Old Nassau lives as long as those 300 year old geezers who are still collecting Social Security checks.
We have the chance to create a valuable partnership with the powers that be and avoid the fate of some of our more naïve friends across the Ivy League. Nevertheless, it will require us to do more than just remove the DEI from our motto “Dei sub numine viget”. Using the following steps below, we can ensure Old Nassau lives as long as those 300 year old geezers who are still collecting Social Security checks.
New club aims to entertain humanities majors during midterms week
Francesca VolkemaDuring this harrowing week, one group of students that find themselves lacking excitement: humanities majors. To combat this discrepancy, the University has introduced a new club called FUNdamentals, the purpose of which is to host activities for humanities majors wanting to feel included in the hustle and bustle of midterms.
During this harrowing week, one group of students that find themselves lacking excitement: humanities majors. To combat this discrepancy, the University has introduced a new club called FUNdamentals, the purpose of which is to host activities for humanities majors wanting to feel included in the hustle and bustle of midterms.