Supportive and inclusive

Emily Rutherford’s column on Annual Giving

That said, I am not writing to add my voice to the Annual Giving discussion, but instead to express my deep disappointment at the community’s response to Ms. Rutherford’s column. As Princeton students, we have learned to engage in spirited exchange and debate. Four years of precepts and seminars have taught me to appreciate myriad perspectives and to rigorously challenge my own assumptions. I have discovered that the best arguments are nuanced, not absolute, and that controversial ideas are beneficial to all, precisely because they challenge us. They force us to take stock of our beliefs and either to revise them or, through developing counter-arguments, to arrive at a firmer understanding of why we hold them in the first place.

I am disheartened and disturbed by the anonymous ‘Prince’ comments, which run the gambit from uncivil to downright cruel. Many contain nothing of reasoned argument, but much of ad hominem attack. Furthermore, this is not the first time that I have read vicious comments on The Daily Princetonian website or Princeton FML. The latter site, though less conducive to ad hominem bullying, has nevertheless become an outlet for juvenile sentiments that are disgusting and unpleasant at best and offensive at worst. I have read many posts and comments that strike me as sexist, homophobic and the sorts of statements that, expressed in person, would be deemed sexual harassment. The site paints a picture of a Princeton student body that is neither open-minded nor mature and that is eager to treat sensitive issues as crude jokes. The statements I read on Princeton FML and The Daily Princetonian are the sorts of things I have never heard uttered in person. I can only conclude, then, that some members of our community behave respectfully toward others not out of a genuine concern for people’s feelings, but rather because they do not want to be seen behaving badly. This is most unfortunate.

We are capable of far better. For four years I have admired the fascinating and powerful ways in which Princeton students show that they are mature, thoughtful and kind human beings. Why, then, has it become acceptable to do away with respectful and intelligent discourse and to engage in hurtful personal attacks online? As we twist a space for free discourse into a space that is hostile and unpleasant, we do ourselves a disservice. With our casual and thoughtless words, we present an image of Princeton to each other and the world. At the moment, that image looks dismal indeed. Let us constantly remind each other that, when we express ourselves in an online forum, we are still contributing members of this remarkable community and that our comments are still directed at, and affect, real people. Though anonymity assures that none of us will ever be individually implicated in these collective acts of bullying, we implicate our entire community.

I would like to thank Ms. Rutherford for her column and for thoughtfully and respectfully expressing her beliefs. I would like to thank her for challenging the way I understand my relationship with Princeton University and inviting me to reexamine and rearticulate my core values.

I would also like to ask my fellow students to take a moment and reflect on what kind of community we want Princeton to be. Personally, I call for a community that is above all else supportive and inclusive. I call for a community in which we challenge each other’s ideas in the spirit of fellowship, not animosity, and encourage, rather than tear down, our peers. I call for a community in which we strive not to be better than others but to be our best selves and to help others become their best selves. We ought to hold ourselves to the highest standards not only of academic excellence but also of compassion and civility. It is, perhaps, a tall order. But we should expect nothing less of ourselves. We are, after all, Princetonians.

Elizabeth Butterworth is a classics major from Auburn, M.A. She can be reached at ebutterw@princeton.edu.