This summer, the bathroom was a place where I made actual friends, ones that I hung out with outside of the bathroom. Someone had scraped off the "M" and "F" from the bathroom doors, and it was never really clear which one was the girls' bathroom, since both of them always had guys in them. So we would make friends, because you've got to do something to smooth over the awkwardness of the moment when you have to reach out of the shower for your towel and bare all. Not to mention that when there are only 50-some odd people on campus for the summer, something like "Oh hey, I saw you in the bathroom the other day," is a perfectly valid opener. You smile back and say "Nice to meet you, I'm Alexis," even as you gasp and think, "Oh gosh, what part of me did he see?" But by the time you run into each other at a party later that night, you're old pals, and the awkwardness is forgotten.
Now I live in Scully, where I have my own bathroom inside my room, and there's no denying that there are perks. It's quite nice not to have to walk up a flight of stairs and around a corner at 2 a.m. when all I want to do is go to sleep, and it's even more amazing that I have the option of running stark naked across the room if I forget shampoo.
That said, I really feel that this new setup has had a negative impact on my social life. You draw into buildings with all these people that you like and want to live near, but then when do you see each other? In the hallways or the stairwells. Sure, you go visit sometimes, but most of the time you meet in transit. For instance, going to and from the bathroom, at least in most buildings. It's the perfect time to have long conversations with your friend while one of you shuffles around to make sure her towel doesn't fall down and the other ignores his full bladder, all in the name of friendship. But in Scully, we never just idly walk through the halls like that. If I leave the room, I leave with a purpose: I'm going to class or rugby practice or dinner. I'm on a mission, and I'm not inclined to stop and chat. I'm also in the hallway for a shorter amount of time, so I hardly ever run into anyone anyway.
There's a whole microcosm of friendship that has completely disappeared from my life. It makes you realize the brilliance of the residential colleges. The first week, you meet everyone in your RCA's room, and then you go your separate ways and cling to your Outdoor Action group or your sports team, or that one random girl with whom you went to high school, even if you weren't really friends then. But then every day you run into someone from your hall in the bathroom, or on the way to the bathroom and you realize, "You must be in by MOL class if you're up this ungodly hour; let's sit together." Or you start up a conversation and decide to keep hanging out outside of the bathroom. It's not quite the bonding experience they had in my dad's day, when there were no doors on the stalls and you could look the person you were having a conversation with in the eye, but you can't have it all. And what better occasion to start a conversation with that cute boy upstairs than when you meet him in the hall on the way to the bathroom? All the girls have been gossiping about him in the bathroom anyway, and if it's like the Cuyler bathrooms, he's already heard about how hot you think he is through the vent.
Alexis Levinson is a comparative literature major from Santa Monica, Calif. She can be reached at arlevins@princeton.edu.
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