My buddy and me: How Princetonians categorize friendships

In my two-year experience at Princeton, I have found that the word "friend" has loose interpretations. Friends come in so many different varieties that it's often difficult to describe one without qualifying the relationship somehow. This may sound a bit Seinfeld-ian, but after talking with people I know, I have concluded that the Princeton campus fosters basically four types of friendships.

First, there is the classically defined friend, what I will call the "prototypical friend." These are people you know well. The prototypical friend is roommate quality, but need not be a roommate. You eat meals with these people, you may know their family compositions and they are in your close social circle. You go out with prototypical friends on the weekend, take road trips during breaks and stay in touch during the summer. My guess is that about 80 percent of my campus friends are in this category.

Next comes what I'll call the "acquaintance." Interaction with acquaintances is generally characterized by awkwardness. These are the people whose names you usually don't remember and who probably don't remember you. The ambiguity inherent in this relationship makes it uncomfortable, which usually limits interaction with this person after your initial introduction(s).

Acquaintances are frequently introduced in formal social environments or at the 'Street,' but need not be. Meeting at quick meals and sharing conversation with a mutual friend are prime instances for acquaintances to be met. When you pass these people on a path you may look away or give a small acknowledgement, such as a smile or a "hey" — but a conversation is not standard. Snubbing is a route to termination of these associations, but after a prolonged period, the relationship usually deteriorates and an acknowledgement is no longer proffered. Occasionally a good acquaintance will become a prototypical friend, especially if he or she is met during Freshman Week.

Living in Wilson the past two years, I never had the opportunity to meet a "bathroom friend," but upperclass housing has changed that. In general, these are established by constant exposure to familiar faces in the bathroom. A greeting or recognition of the bathroom friend's presence is standard. Some people will attempt full-blown conversation, but the success of these efforts is directly correlated with a bathroom "comfort coefficient." In my experience, bathroom friends may or may not be acknowledged outside the standard meeting place.

Finally, and among the more unique relationships, is the "precept friend." These are people that you meet in a precept, a seminar or a class. Since this relationship can have varying degrees of social interaction and dedication, it too can be ambiguous. If my experience in precept relationships is any indicator — and it may not be since it is very weighted toward humanities courses — about 75 percent of precept friendships decay into acquaintance status. Awkwardness is established because you can't remember names, but you recognize faces. This is especially prevalent with precept friends met in introductory-level economics precepts, which tend to be extremely antisocial.

Precept friendships have the potential to be extremely fruitful. Usually if one precept friend becomes a prototypical friend, so will others from that same precept. For some reason, there is generally a saturation of prospective prototypical friends in certain classes. While there is a chance that the acquaintance or the bathroom friend will become prototypical friends, the precept friend has a much greater chance of partaking in that transformation. Since precepts tend to be more socially comfortable than the bathroom and more substantive environments than those in which acquaintances are met, they can foster long-lasting relationships.

These categories are not set in stone, but a quick inventory of your friendship stock will, I think, reveal their presence. Ryan Salvatore is a Wilson School major from Stamford, Conn. He can be reached at salvatre@princeton.edu.